I’m going to hit some triggering buttons with this one - but hey, isn’t that my special skill? 😅
I’ve talked before on YouTube about awakening. And yes, I know… it’s an overused, cringey, cliché word that makes many people instantly roll their eyes.
But awakening simply means you stop living on autopilot in some area of your life. You stop being ruled by your impulses, your habits, your fears, and yes, even your desires.
You stop being a puppet pulled by invisible strings.
Awakening isn’t about floating in white robes and humming mantras. It’s about seeing the TRUTH of your life and daring to live it consciously.
It’s about self-mastery. Self-realisation. That’s the real spiritual path.
And let me be real - I was asleep for the first 45 years of my life. That’s fine. We all have different timelines.
So let’s lay this down clearly: self-mastery has nothing to do with repression. It’s not “I will resist all temptation.” (a common misinterpretation of the Buddha’s teachings). That’s still bondage, because you’re still at war with yourself.
Real mastery is when you can stand in front of temptation and simply choose. Not out of fear of punishment. Not out of hope for reward. But because you are free.
Are You Asleep or Awake?
Nobody “wakes up” to everything at once. It’s usually gradual.
Maybe one day you realise you hate your job, and that sparks you into becoming an entrepreneur.
Maybe you’re in a dead marriage and, eventually, you find the courage to say it out loud and file for divorce.
Maybe you were once a die-hard supporter of a political party or religious institution, until one day you had a huge WTF moment and stepped away for good.
**Read more about WTF Moment here**
These are micro-awakenings. We all have them.
Sometimes, though, awakening isn’t gentle or gradual at all. Sometimes it hits like lightning after a traumatic event.
The Misunderstood Path
Here’s my issue with spirituality as it’s sold to us. There are two versions:
The mainstream version where spirituality is still seen as woo-woo nonsense.
The New Age version where everything is “love and light” but God forbid you want money, sex, pleasure, or joy.
That’s why you get priests preaching celibacy on Sunday… and sneaking into shadows at night.
Neither of those versions rock my boat.
I’ve read, studied, and listened to more schools of thought, gurus, and theologies than I can count. And yet I can’t (for the life of me) stick to just one.
Maybe I was never meant to be a follower.
So I’ve created my own book of life, built on the wisdom I’ve collected. I strip away the dogma, the cultural filters, and stick to what’s universal. Because at their core, all traditions point to the same few principles anyway.
Redefining Spirituality
According to most people preaching spirituality, I cannot possibly be “one of them” while also being an OF model selling sexual pixels online.
I disagree (of bloody course).
To me, what’s not spiritual is bombarding people with ads, hacking their subconscious, and manipulating them into buying crap they don’t need so you can cash in.
And yet those people get to call themselves “spiritual” and “awakened”?
Please.
But that’s a rant for another day.
What I want to talk about here is the word nobody likes to face: repression.
Repression always breeds distortion.
The real spiritual path doesn’t deny the body. It integrates it.
It doesn’t kill desire. It transmutes it.
It doesn’t run from sex. It learns to see through it.
And above all, it lives by the one golden rule:
"Do unto others as you would have them do unto you"
That one rule alone makes you infinitely more spiritual than any guru selling you enlightenment while secretly breaking every vow they ever preached.
Sex as Survival
Anyways, to my point…
When you’re asleep, sex feels like survival. Like oxygen. Like something you must have just to feel alive.
That’s why so many people get hooked on porn, obsessed with chasing novelty, or drowning themselves in endless stimulation.
It’s not really sex they’re addicted to - it’s aliveness.
And when you can’t find aliveness within, you go hunting for it in other people’s bodies, in glowing screens, in fantasies that never end.
That’s survival sex.
It comes from lack. From hunger. From the illusion that someone else can fix your emptiness.
Sex as Choice
But once you wake up, sex stops being survival. It becomes choice.
It becomes art. Expression. Play.
The same way you might enjoy a football match or a trip to the cinema.
You stop approaching it with frantic hunger, that fear of missing out, that ache to fill the hole inside you.
You don’t use it as duct tape for loneliness or boredom.
You enter it whole. Not starving.
That’s why I dare to say: if sex (or food, alcohol, money, power) is an addiction, you are not awake.
Addiction means you are ruled.
Awakening means you are free.
The Recalibration of Desire
Here’s the paradox most people don’t get: awakened men can still subscribe to an OF page if they want to. Consciously.
They can be deeply content in their lives, fully connected to the divine, and still… human. Still curious. Still horny.
Awakening doesn’t mean castrating yourself.
You can still have wild, passionate, mind-blowing sex. But the flavor changes.
It’s not needy. It’s not compulsive.
It’s about meeting another person fully. Body and soul.
Desire still moves through you, but it doesn’t own you.
You don’t use the erotic as an escape. You use it as revelation.
That’s the recalibration. Desire doesn’t disappear. It gets upgraded.
The Point of All This
Awakening doesn’t mean celibacy. That belongs to another era - the one where nuns locked themselves in monasteries and priests “visited” them in secret.
(You can imagine the rest or read this article but, be warned, is disturbing😖).
And just to be clear: I’m not saying sex is “bad” or that wanting it makes you unspiritual. Quite the opposite.
Sex is a sacred mirror.
It reveals where you’re awake and where you’re still asleep.
If you’re chasing it like a drug, you’re still in bondage.
If you can take it or leave it and, when you take it, it’s joy, play, and pure presence, then you are free.
That’s the difference.
Sex as survival vs. sex as choice.
Love,
Rose 🌹
Sex is not a sin. Greed is.
I had a meltdown yesterday. Not even midday. I’d been up since six (my choice, I’m a morning person). Out of nowhere, I started crying and ended up lying on the sofa for two hours doing absolutely nothing. N-O-T-H-I-N-G.
